Browsing Tag

hope

5 Ways to Make Your Christian Single Life More Successful

If you’re a single or single again Christ follower, you will definitely want to check out my Living Single blog.

Each post will encourage you with inspiring and relevant content for your dating life—and your whole life as a vibrant and emotionally healthy person.

So, whether you’re waiting or dating, getting over a breakup and looking to heal your heart or just wondering how to navigate life as a single person, there’s something for you.

To begin, here are links to my Top 5 Living Single blog posts. You’ll find more helpful info on the blog.

Read. Enjoy. And share with others.

And ask God to guide your dating life—and your whole life—into His absolute best for you.

1. The Power of Wisdom: Making Better Choices in Your Dating Life

Wisdom is essential—in your dating life and in your whole life. Without it we often do foolish things that hurt others or ourselves.

2. Waiting? 5 Important Ideas to Help You Wait Well

God has good reasons for delays. We may not always understand what He is doing or like it, but the One who loves us most asks us to obey his commands—not to withhold from us, but to protect us and guide us.

3. Building Confidence and a Solid Self Esteem

When you fail to see who you really are, you lose sight of your true worth and value. Like a pair of glasses with the wrong prescription, the lenses through which you’ve been viewing your life may have become distorted. And you need God’s perspective, the true view, to gain a clearer vision and see yourself as He sees you.

4. Brokenness and the Healing Power of Surrender

God is in the business of healing broken hearts and lives. He redeems our losses and messes for His good purposes. But it’s not always easy. The good news is that a transformation of the heart happens as we surrender to God our longing, our lack, our mess, our confusion, our whole hearts.

5. How the Church Can Welcome Singles and Help Them Thrive

While the church is a place to worship, connect and serve—a place to find community and fellowship—many singles find the church to be a lonely place. Some feel “less than” because of their marital status. They feel unseen, forgotten or left out…How do you meet their needs and ensure singles grow in their faith?

Read more helpful and encouraging blogs for singles by Jackie M. Johnson at….Living Single Blog. 

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Dealing with Grief and Loss: Powerful Hope for Finding Joy Again

Losing someone you loved is difficult. No doubt about it.

Whether the loss was due to a death, a separation, a divorce or a relationship breakup, it’s often a difficult and messy process to get through the sadness and back to joy again.

Recently, a friend of mine lost her mother. Her passing was unexpected. Sudden. She is wondering how to find her way forward.

Rev. Billy Graham passed in February. His life and ministry have touched the lives of people around the globe.

Although I never met him personally, he was an excellent example of a life well lived. Surely, he will hear the words from the Lord as he greets Him in Heaven, “Well done, good and faithful servant!”

How do you move forward from grief and loss?

Navigating the strange and stormy waters of grief is hard. But not impossible.

Everyone’s healing journey will be different. And God may use different methods to lead you from sorrow to joy. And that’s okay. He is God. He knows what He is doing. We simply need to trust Him.

Comfort and support

Many people find comfort and support in the warm embrace of a close friend, a listening ear, or kind words. We need our friends to help us remember what we already know, or to say nothing and simply be there with us in the midst of the pain.

Soul support also comes thought journaling (writing down) prayers or feelings.

Healing can come through rest, or a change of scenery. Being out in the beauty of nature, God’s creation, is restorative. Music can be comforting, too.

Knowing God is with you, and that He is your comforter, brings peace as the words of Matthew 5:4 affirm, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”

Cling to God’s promises, hold on to hope, and surrender your pain to Him in prayer. He is with you—always.

Remember, that grief unprocessed, ignored or denied, will fester and build up inside you. But processing the pain brings release and relief. Feel your feelings and then chose to move forward, one step at a time, in the power of God’s Holy Spirit working in you.

Worship and the Word

When you are feeling hopeless the most powerful thing you can do is worship. Sing songs of praise. Or listen to them.

Despair cannot journey where praise and worship reside.

You may be too grief-stricken to know what to say. But you can put on a worship music CD, or even just sit with your eyes closed and ask God to heal your heart as you rest, focusing on His amazing love and comfort.

As we give God our praises, He gives us His presence.

Focusing on His character and what He has done for you lifts you to a new place.

Like rain soaks the desert and brings forth colorful cactus blossoms, worship and prayer bring renewal to a withering heart.  

Soak in God’s Word

In addition to worship, spending time reading God’s Word, the Bible, brings comfort and hope.

Discover the treasure that is in the Word of God. It is your spiritual food, nourishment every day; essential in times of need.

Open your Bible, there’s hope inside. Read it, ask God to open your eyes to the truth.

The good news is that there is life after loss. Day by day, step by step and choice by choice things start to change and light replaces the dark corners of your heart.

In March 2011, a tsunami caused by an 8.9 magnitude earthquake devastated northeastern Japan. It caused widespread destruction and extensive damage to coastal cities. The official death toll exceeded 9,000 lives. The landscape is now a sea of debris—a once thriving community is a veritable wasteland.

I once watched a TV program about that disaster and one survivor said, “There’s a different kind of strength you find after you’ve survived something terrible.”

Tragedies can undo us; they can also make us stronger.

When you are weak, God is your strong comfort. When you are exhausted, He is your strength—firm and secure. The Light of the World shines as your beacon—a lighthouse in the midst of the storm to guide you to safe harbor.

Light always overcomes the darkness.

 

Prayer: Lord, I come before you today. You know my heart; you see my tears. You hear my cries for help in this time of adversity. Some days I am sad, other days I am just numb. But you are with me always, and that makes all the difference. Help me through this time of grief and loss. You are stronger than anything that comes against me and I put my trust in You, the One who loves me most. I choose to leaning on you and your unchanging love and truth. Comfort my heart. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.

For more help and hope on handling grief and loss or other difficult times, see Jackie M. Johnson’s Hope on the Go and Praying With Power When Life Gets Tough.

 

 

 

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Single on Valentine’s Day? 5 Ways to Find Joy

Single on Valentine’s Day?

For some unmarried folks, February 14 (the holiday that celebrates all things love and romance) can be challenging.

I know people in the “uncoupled” stage of life who bemoan their single status and gripe to just about anyone who will listen about what they don’t have. For example,

I just want a boyfriend.

I just want to be married.

Why does she get a second husband when I haven’t had one at all?” 

You probably know singles like that. I know I do.

Then there are the cynical ones who mock the red heart holiday with snide remarks like,

Who cares? It’s just a Hallmark holiday anyway.

On a more positive note, I know a bunch of interesting and intelligent single women who celebrate V-Day with friends—they throw a party and just have fun.

Singles look at this romantic holiday with very different attitudes.

So if you don’t have a boyfriend or girlfriend right now, and you want to enjoy (not just endure) Valentine’s Day, you have some choices to make about your perspective and your attitude.

Here are five ways singles can find more joy on the love holiday—and the rest of the year: 

1. Know and believe the truth. First, your feelings are valid. It’s OK to be discouraged when you don’t have someone special to love (or like). But don’t set up camp there. Move forward with hope by telling yourself the truth about your identity and your single status.

• God’s Word says you are dearly loved, the “apple of His eye.” He is with you; He is for you. He cares about every area of your life. Yep, even your love life.

• Don’t allow one day of the year, February 14, define your identity. Whether you have a significant other or not, you are worthy and wonderful. 

• You are not “less than” or “not good enough” because you are single. It’s simply not true.

• And here’s a fact: You are not alone. Nearly 50.2 percent of us (or 124.6 million American adults) are single.

2. Surrender. Sometimes we hold on so tightly to what we think we want and how the whole dating/marriage thing is supposed to play out.

I have learned that the way to find peace is to surrender, to yield to the will of One who loves us most, and allow God to reign in this area of my life.

Knowing that God wants the very best for me allows me to trust Him. And be at peace.

In my book, When Love Ends and the Ice Cream Carton Is Empty, I talk about the fact that God is all about love and relationships.

But sometimes we try to fill that desire for lasting love with other things or people, and they leave us feeling empty and alone.

“Often we try to load up our heart and fill the holes with what another person thinks, says, or does when it was meant to be filled by God. He won’t let anyone be our total fulfillment, otherwise we wouldn’t need Him.

It’s not wrong to want a relationship. God is all about relationships…As we put God first in our heart affections, He fills up the emptiness and we are able to receive the love of others, retain it, and give it away.

Perhaps you think because God hasn’t given you someone to love, that He doesn’t care or that He’s forgotten about your desires. God is not forgetful or uncaring. He is constantly at work in the lives of His children, and everything God does is for a reason—even His divine delays.”

3. Prepare. Are you ready to be in a relationship? Maybe it’s time to think about getting rid of the garbage in your head and your heart. You know, the stuff that no longer belongs—like bad attitudes about the opposite sex or a critical spirit.

Think about what you really want in your next relationship and how things can be different next time. Was the last guy you dated too serious and you want someone more playful? Did you have a hard time getting your previous girlfriend to attend church with you when that’s an important part of your life? What do you really want in a dating relationship?

4. Pray. Ask God to show you what needs to change in your own life to prepare for your next relationship.

What areas of your life need work—your spiritual life, physical, social, financial and the like?

Also, pray for your future husband or wife. Pray for the qualities you want in another person and ask God to develop in you the qualities that you need to bring to the table.

5. Choose joy now. Don’t wait to have a man in your life or a woman on your arm to be happy. Sure, it’s Valentine’s Day and love is in the air. But you, single friend, can choose to have peace and joy in your life despite your circumstances.

If you get invited to a pity party, don’t RSVP! Make a plan to get together with other single friends. Celebrate love of all kinds and send a card (yep, snail mail) to family members or friends to show you care.

Instead of drowning your sorrows in massive amounts of chocolate this Valentine’s Day, rejoice in who you are—dearly loved, special and chosen by God.

Despite your feelings, you can choose joy today.

Don’t let one candy-infused, heart holiday hijack your hope.

I, for one, choose to be confident and hopeful—on Valentine’s Day and every day of the year.

And you can too.

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Hard Day? Help is Just a Prayer Away

So you’re having a hard day, or a challenging life. It seems like one thing after another has got you down.

Maybe you’re stressed because there’s so much to do and never enough time.

Maybe you don’t like your job—or you don’t even have one.

Maybe you’re exhausted trying to balance work and family and the demands of life pulling at you from all sides.

You want life to be different—better. And, often you wonder how anything is ever going to change. You need strength and courage to keep on going.

You need hope.

The good news is that help is just a prayer away. The One who loves you most is always here. God is ready to listen, to love you and work His will in your life.

Prayer starts with talking with God—and listening. Any place. Any time.

Remember what God has done in the past—the ways He’s helped you before. Looking back can give you hope for what He will do for you today and in the future.

Psalm 68:28 reminds us, “Summon your power, God; show us your strength, our God, as you have done before.”

Ask God what He has for you today. How does God want you to best serve Him today, in this season of your life?

Prayer doesn’t have to be a duty; it can be a delight as you come to know more fully the One with whom you converse. He loves and accepts you. He listens and He cares. He wants the best for you, so you can speak openly and honestly from your heart.

Powerful prayers don’t necessarily have to be long and involved, but heartfelt and sincere.

An effective prayer can be a simple prayer. Preacher and scholar George A. Buttrick once said, “Prayer is listening as well as speaking, receiving as well as asking; and its deepest mood is friendship, held in reverence.”

Your own personal “happy hour,” your quiet time with God, can be a connecting time as you get to know Him more. As you do, you will come to deeper depths of awe at His wonder, worship at His majesty, and acceptance of His never-ending love.

Often we want answers, but first He wants us to want Him—to connect in a mutual, enjoyable relationship.

Believe that God will provide for you. He knows why you’re here, even when you don’t. He created you with a mind to think and reason, with skills and abilities, and with passions and desires.

God wants you to fulfill your heart’s desires and callings too. It’s never too late to begin anew.

God will fulfill His purposes through you. One day, maybe soon, things will turn around.

Press in. Pray on. And keep your eyes open for your answered prayer.

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4 Things to Do When You Feel Like Giving Up: The Power of Perseverance

 

Having a bad day? A bad decade? Life can be challenging no matter what your age or life stage.

How do you press on when you just don’t have it in you?

To stand strong in challenging times, we need a solid foundation.

When a skyscraper is under construction, workers first dig a foundation and then pound steel reinforcing rods called pylons deep into the earth so the building will stand tall and not tumble. Then, concrete is poured into the shaft with the pylons for a super-strong hold.

The same can be true in your life—as you grow deeper, you grow stronger in your faith. As you immerse yourself in the ways and wisdom of God, the reinforced truth, like pylons of

Hope,

Trust,

Courage and

Faith,

help you become stronger on the inside.

So when your life is spiraling downward, you will be able to withstand more readily the gale-force winds of hard times and pain.

Steel upon steel, story upon story a structure is built. Likewise, God’s Word tells us that hope comes step by step as “suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. (Romans 5:3, 4)

So, how do you press on when times are tough? Here are some vital things to help you persevere with God’s strength:

1) Cast your cares. Don’t take on burdens you were never meant to bear—like worry, fear and doubt. They’ll weigh you down and hinder you from being effective.

Instead, give God your fears; surrender trying to do it all on your own to Him. In other words, like a fishing line, “cast your cares, and don’t reel them back in again.” Psalm 55:22 says, “Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.”

2) Press on in prayer. Prayer is the foundation upon which everything else is built in your life. It the most important thing you can do. You may think, “I’ve already prayed, what other solutions are there?” Keep on praying.

Talk to God about your situation, because He is the one who has the power to change it. As you pray, believe God is working and stand in the strength you receive.

3) Send in reinforcements. Sometimes you need backup. It’s amazing what happens when you receive support in prayer from friends and family members who are willing to pray for you and with you.

When you don’t know what to pray, when you’re spent emotionally or physically, or, like Moses, when you need someone to “hold up your arms” (to support you), the prayers of others on your behalf can give you a boost to keep going.

4) Take action. Taking one small step can lead to another and another and it builds momentum, and things begin to change. You will not be in this hard place forever.

God will help you through. Unlike others who may have let you down, God keeps His promises. When you take action in prayer, God moves on your behalf.

Perseverance takes courage. Believe that God hears your prayers; He sees your tears, and He is at work in your life.

There are still purposes to be fulfilled—lives to touch, things to accomplish, and character to be formed on the inside.

Press on, pray on, with holy tenacity, holding on to hope that one day—maybe soon—things will change for the better: the check will come, the job will be yours, or the house will be filled with a child’s laughter.

Today, we pray and trust Him.

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